Day 133 – The Art of Spewage.

I feel like shit and I look like shit and today has left me spewing everything I put down my gob.

I woke up this morning and the pains were very present. Ahhh yes I have a lap band I reminded myself. I sat by the side of my bed and placed my hands on my thighs and just took my time relaxing and breathing. Breathe in breathe out and breathe in and breathe out.

I slowly got up and waddled my way to my kitchen. I put my glass up against my water filter and watched intently as my glass filled. I aint feeling well I told myself.

I sipped my water and the last few sips came flying back up my throat and I sprayed my entire kitchen sink and windowsill. Ahhh fuck I just Ajaxed the crap out of my sink and dusted my windowsill and now my water spewage was everywhere. I grabbed some cloths and cleaned up and then made my way to the bathroom where I got ready for work.

I got to work still feeling like shite but I convinced myself to suck it up and move on. I tried to ignore the yuk pains and just concentrated on m y job. I looked down at my gut area (in between my boobs until my belly button) and noticed that I was quite swollen. I raced to the mirror and took a side view, yep I’m swollen, I'm gassy and now it makes sense as to why I feel so uncomfortable.

Sue came to work with coffees and it took my 4 hours to sip it and I spewed at the 2-hour mark. The warm coffee though felt lovely on m y band. Immediately after my first sip I felt this warmth spread through m y chest wall but my band just feels so tight. Why does this happen? And what brings this tightness on?

Lunch was supposed to be leftover lentil soup but I convinced Andrew (my boss) to do the lunch run and get me some rice from works local noodle shop. I managed 4 tablespoons of Nasi Goreng and yes I dodged all the meat bits and I took almost an hour to go through 4 spoonfuls of my lunch and then whamo bamo it was over.

I paced the kitchen and steri room (dental sterilization room) rubbing my chest and praying for death or a quick painless spew. I didn’t die and I sadly didn’t have a painless spew, in fact I hacked my guts up and it hurt but I seriously have the art of spewage down pat. I lean slightly over the bowl and open my mouth take a deep breath in and KAPOW its on. It flies out of my mouth and I get every single last drop into the bowl.

Went around to my parents place and took one bite of mums dinner and out that came. I am now sitting on my sofa slowly eating some yoghurt and it feels so nice to have some food that is going down painlessly and I know will stay down too.

This is what happens when you have too much restriction and I can’t wait to go and have 1 ml taken out. Work is so busy at the moment and will be busy from now until Christmas and taking time off is going to be almost impossible. Patience and perseverance is what is needed.

Reney