Day 110 – The pains have started again.

I had yesterday and today off work and it’s been great having a 4-day weekend. I have to say I wish I were rich enough to not have to work. Now that my friends would ROCK !!!! I actually enjoy doing whatever I please and not having to deal with patients, as lovely as some of them are.

One thing that I have noticed these last few days is that each and every morning when I am waking up I am starting to have pains again. Everything seems like its frozen inside me. I am back to taking a good 15 minutes to physically get up and out of bed. I am so irritable again in the mornings. Is this what happens when there is too much restriction?

My routine for the past 2 and a bit months has been that each and every morning I drink a glass of water, then I sip a V8 juice. At the moment drinking water is so hard first thing in the morning. I even tried drinking a cup of hot water today to warm things up inside but it didn’t really help. Has anybody else ever experienced this? I can live with it so its not like it is suppressing me or holding me back but it is frustrating. I have researched this and have come up with nothing.

On the exercise front I managed a walk last night with Elvis, which was fun. My left shoulder is cramped up and stiff and has been for the past 7 days so I am restricted with doing any weights at the moment. It can be very frustrating for me as there is always some sort of bloody obstacle that comes my way. Maybe its because I want to lose this weight fast. Which is wrong of me. I know that “slow and steady” wins the race. I guess I need to stop putting unnecessary pressure on myself.

I tried a pair of size 16 jeans this morning and I’m not quite there yet. I bought these jeans pre-surgery, as I always wanted a pair of these jeans. They fit and they button up but they were waaaay too snug (severe case of camel toe, if you get my drift) and I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t even bend over in them. It didn’t upset me that I looked like a huge elephant in them I was ecstatic as at least I am squeezing into them. Pre-surgery I couldn’t hike them up past my knees. I am really excited that this time next year (if not sooner) they will fit.

That’s what delights me the most, the fact that I will be able to comfortably wear clothes that aren’t stretch fabric and I will be happy with what looks back at me in the mirror. When I say that I mean that there are days that no matter what I wear I feel like a huge, fat, ugly cow.

I can’t wait to wear pants to work everyday. It’s amusing how it’s the little things that make me excited. Things such as not wearing skirts all the time, not having to wear stockings or tights every day, wearing clothes that aren’t stretchy or baggy. I just can't wait until I get to my goal weight.

Peace Out!!!

Reney