I haven’t had a chance to do much exercise these last 3 days as I started work and the weather in Melbourne and been intense. I know it was no excuse and I shouldn’t be making excuses. So this morning I was up by 7.30am and as soon as I woke up I put my trainers on and went for my 40-minute walk/run. It wasn’t foggy today but darn it was soooo cold.
After Elvis and I got home from our walk/run I stripped down to my bra knickers and gave into temptation again and weighed myself. I was down ½ a kilo. I was really happy with this, as now in total I have lost 8 and half kilos in only 3 weeks. It’s mad.
So far a good few hours to the day…
Then I drove to my bestie Vic’s work to pick her up as we had organised to spend the afternoon down High Street, Armadale. We were both excited about catching up and hanging out and had been discussing this all week. Unfortunately things don’t always go to plan and this is one of my pet peeves. I am a stickler for time and I thrive on routine, I am finicky about changing plans at the last minute and I have a serious issue with running late. So having said that Vic was delayed at work by a patient who decided to rock up to their appointment in their own sweet time so instead of leaving her work place by 1.00pm, we sadly didn’t get out until 2.15pm. Grrr!!!
By the time we arrived in Armadale, it was 3.oopm; we parked the car and started browsing through a few shops. We didn’t have much time to shop and this just aggravated me because I so wanted to walk up and down High Street like a yuppie. I was really and truly looking forward to window shopping and getting closer to my 10,000 steps. So anal Reney was not a happy person, as our plans did not go accordingly.
An observation I made - Have you noticed how the majority of people that live and shop down there are such tossers? So downright snobby and rude, and when they greet each other with “Ohhh Daaaaarling” they yell it at each other. Why do they do this? Why do they air kiss each other? I don’t yet it.
So by now my day is getting shittier and shittier…
Today has not been a very good day for me as I was questioned by a “family acquaintance” on the amount of weight I have lost, what I’m eating, whether I am drinking, blah, blah, blah and this is when my blood pressure hit 2000! I seriously felt my blood pressure rise and my ears were burning and I caught myself holding my breath as I was really pissed off. I have never bitten my tongue like I did today.
Why is everyone such a f*****g expert? If they claim to know so much then why the f**k do they interrogate me and advise me on what I should and shouldn’t be doing. I am ropable, I am furious and I want to start cracking heads open.
I knew I should have never confided in this person and I distinctly remember when I was telling this person that my head was screeching alarm bells. I wish I had enough hands to slap myself stupid.
Its not just this person that is infuriating me it’s a lot of people around me. I’m sick and tired of being watched. I’m getting really tired having people ask me how much weight I have lost and in how much time and then watching me eat and drink. And then the questions about my portion sizes. Its getting on my nerves and I am on the verge of going off and really losing my temper. I am feeling like I am continuously being watched and judged and its messing with my head big time.
I don’t want to be made to feel guilty with what I am eating. Maybe its not intentional and maybe people care but I am feeling guilty every time I grab a glass of water or sit down to eat my lunch. I just want friends and family to back off and leave me be.
It also goes to the other extreme. If I am feeling full and content and not eating people start pushing me to eat. I can’t get people to understand that I feel FULL. Have you ever eaten a meal when at the same time you feel FULL? No sane person would eat a thing if they felt how I feel. At the end of the day I guess people cant get their heads around it. So maybe I am being a grumpy old cow?
If I complain about my aches and pains I’m told to suck it up and move on. Then why ask me how I’m feeling?
I have just experienced the most intense 3 weeks of my life. I had surgery that has changed my life, I was diagnosed with this “Oxygen Saturation” Issue and I have lost more weight in 3 weeks than I could ever have imagined yet I’m just not having a happy day and I’m feeling irritated with everyone and yet I am not even hormonal.
Lets hope tomorrow brings me a better day.
Reney
P.S -The photo is of High Street, Armadale.
1 comment:
Firstly - congrats on the 1/2 kilo lost... always cool to lose weight..
And that's why I didn't tell anyone I was getting the band. Cos of all those freaking questions, the stares, the looks.. etc. By not telling people I'm still "normal"... I just eat less. The person you told that you didn't think you should have, did they blab?? Did you want to keep it quiet?
LBG xx
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